Rogue Prediction, Britain 2007

The f1 paddock is rife with rumor and intrigue after the discovery of a massive scandal involving many people across a whole gamut of disciplines from almost every team (with the notable exception of Spyker who are too dull) from the most lowly cleaner to the highest paid technical director. A paper trail of e-mails, faxes, untraceable phone calls and secret meetings will hopeful be concluded soon with the result that Ralf Schumacher (or Adrian Sutil) can be blamed after a short but compelling witch-hunt and be publicly flogged on the starting grid by Bernie Ecclestone in a worldwide TV event seen by approx 75% of the planets' population. James Allen will be implicated as an accomplice in the alleged "Stepneygate" affair and will be punished by Max Mosley giving him a really rather painful Chinese burn whilst the Silverstone crowd cheer him on and the Red Arrows do a flypast and display including their new formation "Albers" which involves all 9 planes flying really slowly and erratically then the last plane tries to crash into either:

• the ground, 
• at least 4 of the others ,
• a VC10 air to air tanker

Or, all of the above whilst the whole squadron is put up for auction on E-Bay and red leader tries to sue all the other airforces of the world for using much better bought-in planes and that’s just not on I say.

Torrential rain is the order of the day and whilst Bridgestone demo their new range of  wet weather tyres: Drizzel, Damp intervals, and Quick-Better get the washing in this looks like it might go on for a while and I did the Duvet today isn’t that flippin typical. Hamilton simply walks on water and wins before being elevated to simultaneous saint and knighthood.

So at the flag its:

1. Hamilton.
2. Hidefelt
3. Button, (who? you ask)

Due to podium peer pressure, after the race Lewis tries unsuccessfully to grow a beard whilst being interviewed by a very excited Louise Goodman who's breathless first question goes like this: "Well Lewis,Ohhhhhhhh another fantastic win, Mmmmmmmmmmmm I could just eat you all up, yummmmmmm, and frankly I'm game, OOOOOOOHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhAaaaaahhhhhhhhhh how about it then?" and James Allen mumbles "hey! I was going to say that…"

Er, allegedly….

Posted by The Predictor at July 6, 2007, 12:29 am - Comments (0)
Tagged as: formula one, formula1, f1, britain, 2007, mclaren, ferrari, espionage, silverstone, bernie, schumacher, hamilton

Bernie thinks McLaren should be punished

Bernie E. thinks that McLaren should receive a fine, points deduction or even exclusion from the championship if they are found guilty of using team orders during the Monaco GP.

If McLaren are excluded then it will put pay to Hamilton’s rookie year which so far has gone extremely well. Points deduction or a fine will probably be for McLaren and not affect the drivers. It is impossible to say whether or not Hamilton would have overtaken Alonso on the confined Monaco streets should he have been allowed to catch up with the Spanish driver. As such changing the drivers points would not seem to do any good.

The last time a driver was excluded was in 1997 when Michael Schumacher was punished for his final race of the year collision with Villeneuve. Schumacher came second which is as good as last to the multiple world champion. The punishment effect was basically zero. If McLaren are excluded it will only fuel the accusations that the FIA has a Ferrari bias.

The results of the inquiry are due on Wednesday afternoon.

Source: GPUpdate

Posted by Jules at May 30, 2007, 10:51 am - Comments (0)
Tagged as: formula one, formula1, f1, bernie, schumacher, ferrari, mclaren, moncao, 2007, 1997, investigation