Rogues Review: Spain 2008: Walls hurt

Rarely is a race in Spain a good one. There have been the notable exceptions, Mansell and Senna dueling down the main straight, Schumacher mastering the rain like no other. Sadly this race was not to be such an awe inspiring event. It was an event though. The whole world held their breath as Kovalainen plunged into the tyre wall.

I’ve seen two such plunges. In 1999 Silverstone witnessed Schumacher plunge from the track after locking up. After skimming across the gravel the high speed impact on the wall broke his leg and lost him the championship. He was OK save the leg and ultimately it was one of those incidents that happens. Just like Kovalainen’s, something broke just at the wrong point.

At Spa in 2001, Luciano Burti plunged in the tyre wall and almost disappeared under a mountain of tyres at the exit of one of the high speed corners on the main straight. This was not a part failure, this was a poor overtaking move from Eddie Irvine. The Irishman also left the track but was not harmed. Irvine took part in the rescue attempt, even getting a vehicle to pull out the Prost of Burti from under the tyres. Burti suffered, from this impact, with concussion. Kovalainen had much of the same, except he did not get injured. Not really. Sure a bump or two and massive headache but he was lucky that we are in a modern age. Greater drivers have died for less.

Whilst this post has taken a somewhat somber mood, we will attempt to lighten it with some funny remarks about all the other drivers that did the ridiculous. Sadly, there was simply not enough to offset the meat wagon that took away Kovalainen. Barrichello and Piquet, however, did manage to provide some sort of comic interlude.

Barrichello managed to break his nose cone during a pit stop. It’s been a good long while since some dramatic has happened in the pits - with the odd exception of a member of a pit crew being run over. Unlike the unlucky Barrichello, Piquet just managed to be stupid. Having a little on and off moment is embarrassing enough, but hitting a slower car whilst trying to regain your race position is even more stupid.

For pure rogue behavior we have to look, in this race, to Sato and Massa. Massa proved that hand waving still works as he vented some first waving fun at a back marker. When being passed by Coulthard Sato got our attention, going a bit wide whilst Coulthard tried to overtake around the outside, Sato dummied Coulthard that he was going to drive into him. This superb flick of the wrists sent Coulthard yet wider and Sato held out for another lap. Not his usual contact method of trying to stay in front but none the less enjoyable.

What's hot and what's not in the race

Shiiiiiiit! Dummy Hand shaking fun Nearly there Season standard Kovalainen Sato Massa Alonso Räikkönen Walls are harder than they look Old dogs can be taught new tricks Venting spleen On the way up! The Ice Man is back...

Posted by Jules at April 28, 2008, 11:27 pm - Comments (0)
Tagged as: formula one, formula1, f1, 2008, spain, sato, massa, barrichello, Kovalainen, alonso, raikkonen

Rogues Review: Malaysia 2008: Back to normal

After the start of term, life is back to normal. Malaysia without rain is always going to be dull and this year’s was no exception. Miles and miles of gravel and a track so wide it would rival Heathrow’s main runway, means that the racers have no excuses but to avoid each other, ample space for all with even enough room to park a Minky Whale in between the cars.

Back in the good old days of Michael Andretti, we were treated to an off track moment right from the second the race started. When Andretti left F1, complaining something about having to turn right as well as left we thought those days were over. Now we have Bourdais. Now, in the last race he impressed everyone at F1 Rogues, this race he impressed us yet more. Almost at the very start, Bourdais managed to find the gravel and an early shower by himself.

After that the race slipped into the usual pattern, some cars going off and then on again. The off again, then on again and so on. Glock was mostly helped off the track by Rosberg who ended up with a trip to the pits to put a new nose on as a result. By lap 19 we were up to the first round of stops. Hamilton, desperate to make up time after suffering a 5 place grid penalty, had an agonizingly slow pit stop. The right front tyre men had trouble with their job and it was a 20 second pit stop from hell. Oh, how we love it!!!!

For the remainder of the race not much happened, a few more offs and ons and off and ons later, Massa managed to park it well and truly in the gravel. Never quite being as good as his teammate is beginning to show already… Vettel was next to in suffering from a blown engine which was the same fate that met his teammate in Australia.

Lastly we pay special homage to Barrichello. In the last race, he got a stop go penalty and was disqualified and this race he continued his new tradition. A drive though for speeding in the pit lane will easily see him become F1 Rogues top driver of 2008…

What's hot and what's not in the race

*Still* Man of the year Not good enough! Pit stop from hell Path to glory Back on top Barrichello Massa Hamilton Kubica Räikkönen Less penalties. Overall improvement Beached whale Need a new pit crew! Good start to the year The Ice Man is back...

Posted by Jules at March 25, 2008, 12:05 am - Comments (0)
Tagged as: formula one, formula1, f1, 2008, hamilton, kubica, barrichello, rosberg, raikkonen, malaysia

Rogues Review: Australia 2008: Term starts!

Ah the first day back at term has been completed. And as predicted here at F1Rogues there was much mayhem.

Without traction control it was always going to be an interesting race. The first lap proved that drivers can’t keep control of themselves net alone themselves and their wheel spin. At the first corner Fisichella ended up the victim and Massa proved that spinning whilst there is a crash at the same corner is a good way of not looking too much like an idiot, at least until the replays are shown. Within the lap the Safety Car was out for the first of many trips, with many drivers diving for the pits to put back on parts of the car that should be attached rather than hanging off the side.

Massa, not satisfied with his first lap spin, tried to make up for lost ground. Trying to unlap himself on lap 26 Masses harpooned Coulthard. The new result was that Red Bull Racing was now completely out of the race after local hero Webber retired shortly after the race began. Unlapping yourself is allowed in F1, and quite frankly was bound to happen when it’s Ferrari versus Red Bull Racing. Eddie Irvine once unlapped himself by passing Senna. Whilst there was no collision Senna was so incensed about this, he took it upon himself to confront the Irishman after the race "knocking" him off a table in the process. Coulthard did make his voice known, slamming Massa for ramming into him. Massa received damage from the collision and retired a few laps later with engine problems.

The race went a bit "quiet" after Massa’s little incident until Glock discovered exactly what everyone meant about the dangers at turn 12. It had been mentioned that the exit of turn 12 represented a bit of a danger. A small bump on the grass on the exit could cause a car to get air. Glock discovered this was true and very almost managed to put himself upside down. In the end, he span gracefully up the track coming to a halt against the wall. He came to rest missing some major parts and quietly shitting himself. It was in the subsequent Safety Car period that Barrichello showed that if you are going to mess up, you better mess up good. With no fuel left the team were forced to make the Brazilian pit. However, once the Safety Car comes out the pit lane closes. This is so the track officials can get some order on the track before all the fun begins again. It was during this illegal refuelling stop that his lollipop man got a little excited. Lifting it before fuelling was complete caused the fuelling crew to be dragged over the car. Rightly Barrichello did not stop and went on his way leaving a big heap of arms, legs and flammable liquid on the floor. Now, in case you are not aware, the pits have a traffic light at the end. Two colours are on it, red and green. Barrichello is, apparently, colourblind. He left the pits when the light was red, thus making it a hatrick of stupidity. Barrichello, for all the woes and injuries he got disqualified from the race - for the red light - and handed a 10 second stop-and-go penalty during the race - for pitting during the Safety Car. He got nothing for running over the pit crew... one will expect a kicking from the pit crew in the team garage is almost guaranteed. All this makes Barrichello our man of the race. We look forward to next race where we hope to get a black flag. The only way is up!

Before the pace car had even gone back to the pits, we were treated to yet another display of genius. Nakajima, who managed to run down his pit crew in the previous race, now managed to hit - whilst following the pace car - the high qualifying Kubica. F1Rogues predicted this would happen sometime during this race and Nakajima supplied. Kubica went out of the race; Nakajima got a new nose and a 10 place qualification penalty for Malaysia for the pleasure.

For the rest the race continued without real incident, the only tragic thing being Bourdais’ engine blow whilst running 4th in his first race - in a Minardi. We expect great things from this man.

What's hot and what's not in the race

Man of the year (so far) As predicted Denied Turn around? Looked easy Barrichello Nakajima Bourdais Heidfeld Hamilton CTL+ALT+DEL reset year Not so Safety Car.. "F**k?!?!?!?" Good start to the year Led the whole way

Posted by Jules at March 17, 2008, 8:42 pm - Comments (0)
Tagged as: formula one, formula1, f1, 2008, australia, barrichello, hamilton, bourdais, nakajima, coulthard, heidfeld

Imola crashes (part I)

Christian Albers, 2006
Since the development of Imola to be a safer track following the events in 1994, Imola has become sparse for real accidents. However, 2006 did not disappoint with a first lap incident for Dutch driver Christian Albers. Albers came to grief after Super Aguri driver, Yuji Ide, got a little too enthusiastic trying to overtake up the inside of the Midland Toyota. After 4 complete rolls over the gravel trap, Albers came to rest upside down. Albers was released unharmed from the car after a few seconds.

Rubens Barrichello, 1994
The Variante Alta was where Barrichello had one of the heaviest accidents ever seen at the Imola track. Kicking off the blackest weekend in F1 history, Barrichello, during Friday practice, made a mistake in his line for the entry to the Variante Alta and was launched off the kerb an into the top of the tyre wall on the outside of the chicane. The car was then launched nose first into a series of rolls coming to rest upside down. The impact knocked Barrichello out but he ultimately was not seriously injured.

Roland Ratzenberger, 1994
In Saturday qualifying the 1994 San Marino Grand Prix took a turn for the worst. Whilst overshadowed by events later in the weekend, Ratzenberger ran off the track at Villeneuve and had a massive impact with the wall. Ratzenberger was competing with the Simtek team managed by Nick Wirth and was trying to qualify the Simtek for a place in Sunday's race. Whilst approaching Villeneuve the front wing on his car failed and the car, now left with no frontal downforce, left the track and plunged into the outside wall at round 300 km/h. The car continued on down the track spinning around and eventually stopped at the next corner. Ratzenberger had received massive head injuries from which he never recovered. Ratzenberger's death was the first death since Riccardo Palletti was killed at the Circuit Gilles Villeneuve in 1982.

Gilles Villeneuve, 1980
Father of troublesome individual Jaques Villeneuve, Gilles led an amazing career until his life was claimed in an accident in 1982 at the Belgian track of Zolder.

Whilst racing at Imola in 1980, Gilles crashed out in spectacular fashion after a tyre failure at the corner before Tosa. Hitting the barrier almost head-on the main section of the car bounced back on to the track in to the path of the cars still racing. Gilles was unhurt in the accident

Posted by Jules at May 3, 2007, 7:14 pm - Comments (0)
Tagged as: f1, formula1, villeneuve, imola, albers, barrichello, ratzenberger