Rogue Prediction, Monaco 2008

Qualli:

1. Kubica

Race:

1. Kovileineneneen
2. Raikkonen
3. Webber (yes, really...)

High Attrition race totally overshadowed by Mosleys' off track shenanigans which has caused security furore with some bloke from International Exports (aka James Bond PLC) losing his job because his missus was apparently one of the, er, professional ladies in that video ( well, it's a living I guess, possibly brings in the shopping money).

All a bit tedious now eh? I mean, lets have a proper $ex scandal like Profumo or something at least then we got some tasteful arty pics of Christine Keeler ( though frankly I preferred the classic pic of Peter Cooke in the same pose...)"

Posted by The Predictor at May 24, 2008, 8:30 pm - Comments (0)
Tagged as: formula one, formula1, f1, monaco, 2008, hamilton, monte carlo

Rogues Review: Turkey 2008: Zzzzzz....

Turkey has been won many a time by the erstwhile boy Massa and this race was no difference. With a crash at turn one on the first lap, the Safety Car was out for a earl outing. In all the action Nakajima lost a rear wing and a trip to the pits was made for a replacement or in fact actual retirement. Fisichella was the culprit of the incident and post race tried to deny all knowledge of having caused the accident.

We would like to say from this point onward something actually happened but we would be wrong. The only rogue action happened on Lap 26. At the point where the earth aligned with some important stars of which we forget the name, Bourdais span into retirement. There you go… nothing more except the occasional dust devils in front the grand stands (still 3 miles from the track itself) …

What's hot and what's not in the race

Blind? Early Bath Moment of excitement Ferrari in front (again) Ownage Fisichella Nakajima Bourdais Hamilton Massa What a mistaka da make-a taking it up the rear Spin into retirement That red one in front.. 4 in a row for Ferrari

Posted by Jules at May 12, 2008, 8:46 pm - Comments (0)
Tagged as: bourdais, hamilton, massa, nakajima, fisichella, turkey, 2008, f1, formula1, formula one

Rogues Review: Spain 2008: Walls hurt

Rarely is a race in Spain a good one. There have been the notable exceptions, Mansell and Senna dueling down the main straight, Schumacher mastering the rain like no other. Sadly this race was not to be such an awe inspiring event. It was an event though. The whole world held their breath as Kovalainen plunged into the tyre wall.

I’ve seen two such plunges. In 1999 Silverstone witnessed Schumacher plunge from the track after locking up. After skimming across the gravel the high speed impact on the wall broke his leg and lost him the championship. He was OK save the leg and ultimately it was one of those incidents that happens. Just like Kovalainen’s, something broke just at the wrong point.

At Spa in 2001, Luciano Burti plunged in the tyre wall and almost disappeared under a mountain of tyres at the exit of one of the high speed corners on the main straight. This was not a part failure, this was a poor overtaking move from Eddie Irvine. The Irishman also left the track but was not harmed. Irvine took part in the rescue attempt, even getting a vehicle to pull out the Prost of Burti from under the tyres. Burti suffered, from this impact, with concussion. Kovalainen had much of the same, except he did not get injured. Not really. Sure a bump or two and massive headache but he was lucky that we are in a modern age. Greater drivers have died for less.

Whilst this post has taken a somewhat somber mood, we will attempt to lighten it with some funny remarks about all the other drivers that did the ridiculous. Sadly, there was simply not enough to offset the meat wagon that took away Kovalainen. Barrichello and Piquet, however, did manage to provide some sort of comic interlude.

Barrichello managed to break his nose cone during a pit stop. It’s been a good long while since some dramatic has happened in the pits - with the odd exception of a member of a pit crew being run over. Unlike the unlucky Barrichello, Piquet just managed to be stupid. Having a little on and off moment is embarrassing enough, but hitting a slower car whilst trying to regain your race position is even more stupid.

For pure rogue behavior we have to look, in this race, to Sato and Massa. Massa proved that hand waving still works as he vented some first waving fun at a back marker. When being passed by Coulthard Sato got our attention, going a bit wide whilst Coulthard tried to overtake around the outside, Sato dummied Coulthard that he was going to drive into him. This superb flick of the wrists sent Coulthard yet wider and Sato held out for another lap. Not his usual contact method of trying to stay in front but none the less enjoyable.

What's hot and what's not in the race

Shiiiiiiit! Dummy Hand shaking fun Nearly there Season standard Kovalainen Sato Massa Alonso Räikkönen Walls are harder than they look Old dogs can be taught new tricks Venting spleen On the way up! The Ice Man is back...

Posted by Jules at April 28, 2008, 11:27 pm - Comments (0)
Tagged as: formula one, formula1, f1, 2008, spain, sato, massa, barrichello, Kovalainen, alonso, raikkonen

Rogues Review: Bahrain 2008: We won't mention videos...

With a slight delay due to some temporary relocation of the F1Rogues team to the island the now call the UK to be soon renamed The United Kingdom of Hamilton we being out review of the last race…

Well, I promised when I restarted all this that I would never review what did not happen during the race. Therefore I will not be at all mentioning anything alleged about sex games, grey haired men and prison service. Suffice to say that we can replace any temptation to do that by laughing continuously at Hamilton and his feeble attempts to overtake Spanish ex-teammates.

The race itself promised much but on the whole failed to deliver. We had placed all our money on a Ferrari 1-2 to the gravel trap at the first corner skillfully aided by a shove from a BMW. It seemed inevitable that Kubica would lose his pole position at the getaway so he should have made sure he got it back… Senna style.

To say the race was without incident would not be true. There was plenty of action on the track with both Sutil and Vettel both suffering from engine issues, Piquet having handling issues which resulted in a spin or two, as well as Buttons somewhat clumsy overtaking maneuver on David Coulthard. Both Button and Hamilton proved that when you have a point to prove, you can make it best by running into another car – yes the car is crap and no I don’t know how to overtake. Ultimately this cost both drivers their races. Button had an early bath and Hamilton just struggled to do anything of any note. Unless the fact that we all noted he did nothing worthwhile in the whole race, then, well, he did something note worthy…..

What's hot and what's not in the race

Blind? No room Which way do I drive? Back on track Polish invasion Hamilton Button Piquet Massa Kubica Hard to miss these Renaults Ram braking works better Handling issues? Stolen on the first lap New world order starts NOW!

Posted by Jules at April 9, 2008, 3:38 pm - Comments (0)
Tagged as: alonso, coulthard, vettel, massa, button, kubica, bahrain, 2008, hamilton, movie, video, mosley, max, f1, formula1, formula one